22 days

Menstrual Man, a documentary.
This guy is amazing, sacrificing everything, his reputation, his family, pretty much his life to help women in India.

http://www.menstrualman.com/

It's 3.99 to watch but it's good. Or you can read about it here:

http://www.bbc.com/news/magazine-26260978

Grad school I love you, but you're bringing me down.

Just finishing up the work I can finish up. The uteri/uteruses (someone looked it up, they're both right!) are going to be an ongoing project.
I liked the ideas brought up in my crit about adding wood to the drawers for the pads. I think having an insert at the top that fits flush with the area at the top, covering the Made in America stamp, would be nice. One of the reasons the drawers were so important to the piece comes from Peter Pan. Yes, i'm a Peter Pan fanatic. In the written book version, the mother comes into the nursery at night when the children are sleeping and tidies their minds. It's described as her opening drawers and getting rid of all the extra stuff, and checking on what they are thinking about. This is how she first discovers the name Peter. This picture was always very attractive to me.

Here are some things i'm looking at:

Liza Lou

Feminist books

Jane Perkins

Artnau
The Tattoo page is amazing.

John Crawford

Flavorwire, Women Artists you should know

Katharina Ludwig

Grad School I Love you, But you're bringing me down

Grandma's Bead Stories

Dian Pelangi

Who you gonna call?

Watching Ghostbusters tonight.

Finally finished one of my pieces! To be honest, I haven't thought about anything but the making these past couple of weeks. Here is the writing that i've been doing. It documents the making!

For crit i'd like to talk about the displays i've worked up, and about the quilt.

Beaded pad:

·      It’s less embarrassing buying the pads for the art product then to use for my period. Except I use them for both when I use the wrappers. It’s dumb because the store person doesn’t know the difference anyway.

·      I back them with interfacing so that the needle has something to go through and so that there is a stronger base. If there is no interfacing on the bottom, the sticky parts stick to the needle and the thread pulls through and rips the pad.

·      Choosing colours from memories I associate with different years of my life, or stories of those years for the ones I was too young to remember.

·      Use those colours to choose larger beads to accent the colours. Choosing colours and accent beads takes 5-10 minutes

·      Start from the middle out, from the focal point to the outsides. This sets the pattern from the beginning, and creates an even tension from the middle out so that there are no folds in the cotton.

·      My finger pads get cracked from the cold and the work. I hate thimbles because they are unweildly and annoying, so sometimes I tape my fingers or wear band-aids to prevent stabbing my fingers. Mostly they are calloused enough to protect from getting stabbed.

·      1/24

o   9:30p.m-12:30 a.m, 3.75 hours

o   Watching 30 Rock, Bobs Burgers, Xena Warrior Princess

·      Worked with band-aids today because my fingers are torn up from working with metal.  They keep fraying and getting caught on everything. The needle gets stuck in the pad part and disrupts the flow of the work.

·      1/25

o   8:00p.m.-1:00a.m.,  5 hours

o   watching Last Vegas

o   Eating Mollasas cookies, drinking Limoncillo and La Croix

·      No band-aids today but have to use the pliers to pull needles through pads.

·      Finishing the middle is always rewarding/relieving because it’s a contained area, one unit. The patterns in the middle repeat from pad to pad, three designs in all. It becomes very familiar. The outside patters are annoying but challenging and become interesting at a certain point because they are always different and very small.

·      1/28

o   11:30p.m.-1a.m., 1.5 hours

o   Watching The Heat, it’s completely uninspiring. An un-feminist comedy masquerading as woman’s empowerment. A men vs. Women attitude only encourages hate.

·      So cold out. The dog is going crazy because she hasn’t been out for a walk in a week. The cold is so disruptive, I can’t work when my hands are cold because they cramp up.

Total time for 1 pad is 8-10.5 hours

Quilt square

·      Working in a small space

·      Trying to save pads so as not to waste money, using scraps in between them so they don’t stick to each other.

·      1/28

o   12:30a.m.-1:30a.m. 1 hour

·      It’s tedious cutting out the patterns. There is a lot of prep-work because I have to cut out both the patterns and interfacing.

·      Putting each individual quilt block’s pieces in its own zip-lock helps because I can just grab one and I know all the pieces are there ready to be sewn together

·      Just cutting out pieces I get sick of the smell of the pads. It is this weird baby powder/floral scent. I read that there is only one pad that is actually smell free and odor trapping but it costs much more than any other pad. All the other ones just mask the scent with deodorant type products in the lining of the pad.

·      The scent gets sickening but I think part of it is the scent/memory connection. It reminds me of having my period which makes me a little nauseous, which is what having my period tends to do.

·      The act of unwrapping the pads is somewhat soothing. The sounds and feel, the way I have to straighten them, becomes a small prep-work ritual. The actual use of a pad is somewhat ritualistic as well- unwrapping the clean, white cotton, and then wrapping up and throwing away the dirty ones.

·      9/2

o   11:15-1:00

total time: 1 hour cutting out patterns, 1-1.75 hours to put together one square

Reproductive system

·      

     Cutting out the patterns I do in a big factory style. I have 5 patterns I’ve been working with, so I cut out 5 at a time.

·      I have to make sure to keep every pattern together; I’ve lost pieces before and had to re-cut them.

·      Using the sewing machine goes pretty quickly. It’s hypnotizing, the sound and motion of it. I’ve used my machine so much over the years it’s very easy to get into the swing of using it.

·      Once I get one all sewn together, I have to stuff it and do the hand work. I stuff the ovary pieces first and sew them up, then stuff the tubes and sew the ovary pieces into place. Then I stuff the body of the piece and sew up the vaginal area. Then I sew the definition of the vaginal area into place, so it creates a dip in the fabric.

Sewing these by hand goes a lot slower and is counter-productive. I have done 2 by hand so far because the fabric was slippery and hard to control under the machine. These turned out well, but because of the type of fabric they are more likely to get holes in them

Working hard, hardly working

I say hardly working because this is fun. I had a little while where I was sick of my work, sick of the process, sick of the materials, and especially sick of the smell of the materials. But, visualizing it in the gallery space and really knowing it's going up sooner than later makes it exciting.
I've developed a better display system for the pads. Adding some detail photos of the pads here:

Only two more to make. Ten done. 

And will add photos of the display system as soon as I get some. If you are in the space, stop by and look and let me know what you think! Each pad has a display box with a drawer that opens so they can be inspected easier and touched. I am going to hang each display box on the wall, 1 inch away from the one below, in 4 rows of 3 or 3 rows of 4, not sure.

The quilt is in progress, coming along very nicely. I've reversed it on the wall, again photos to come soon. The texture of the back, as well as the emphasis on the making, is very appealing. I am going to hang it spaced off the wall, so the front is visible with a little work from the viewer. It glows on the wall. Still not 100% sure on this but it is what i'm working with now.

quick health update; Migraines have lessened lately but neck pain is intense. Getting a shot between two vertebrae in a couple of weeks to try and numb the nerves and lessen the pain. Hopefully this allows me to function normally!

wearables

This week has found me writing a lot about my process, on the suggestion of Tamara. It's been interesting to put into words the process of working, something I usually just do and don't think about too much. I've had some interesting revelations about the connection between my day to day activities and my work.
I've also started a new piece, or rather series of pieces. Here is a video of the first one. Please disregard the sound, it's inconsequential to the piece at the moment.

And some photos 

Here are some things i've been looking at this week:

Liza Lou

Feminist classroom

Modern quilting

Jemima Kirke on Women in Art.

At 3:30 is my favorite part. 

National Geographic, Were the First Artist Women?

downhill sledding

Here we are, the start to the final semester! A lot of work to do before the end.

I've been working on making the individual reproductive systems over break. They are pretty easy to do, just kind of tedious. I'm not aiming for perfection on them; they all have flaws, as do all people in the world. Also making more of the beaded pads. I have been reflecting on colour combinations and what those might mean to different people. The cultural perceptions related to colour. I think the feedback I get in Critique about this will be interesting. 

Thinking about where things will go in the show. It is really crazy to go into the gallery and envision work there. Such a big space! Also, for me, just thinking about putting some of the work on the wall is nerve wracking. 

Here are some photos of things i've been working on: 

Some people and things i've been looking at:

Leszek Bujnowski

Vaginal knitting

Bruno Catalano

Daniel Coburn

Myra Mimlitsch-gray

A.J. Fosik

"Why I Wear Nailpolish"

Women Veterans

Genis Carreras

Fredrik Soderberg

Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie at TEDxEuston

golb golb golb

I've been a little lax about blogging lately. woops! Busy busy.
                  I've been delving deeper into the reasons why I am using the materials I am using. I feel like in my work I tend to use materials and concepts I am very uncomfortable with. This started with my work with reliquaries, specifically with my Ant Reliquary:

                I hate ants. I mean HATE them. It stems from when I was a kid, probably about 4 or 5, and I stepped into a red ant hill. They swarmed up my legs before my mom picked me up and brushed them off, and ever since then I hate them!
               When I was younger my mom handed me a bag full of hygiene products, briefly explained what they were for, and that was it. We never talked about it again. I've never felt comfortable with the whole menstruation thing. So when I beaded that pad, and saw how cool it looked, I thought that there is no time but the present to become comfortable with a process that I will be dealing with for the next 40 years (if family history is any indication). Reading about it, searching about how it's handled the world over, and directly exploring the products associated with menses, has made me much more comfortable with the whole thing. I feel like i've overcome something that I should have been comfortable with from the beginning. And that allows me to continue to work with these products in more ways and to push the work as far as it needs to go.
                 This is what i've been looking at:

wearing jewelry differently

Joss Weadon

Holly Gaiman

"I'm not a feminist"

The people who should be "Disney" princesses

I heart guts

Eva Marie Keiser Designs

Tribal designs

Why Creative People Sometimes Make No Sense

A crazy russian performance artist.

WW1 and 2 Propaganda

Female hunters on the rise

Feminist Quiz

SNL Kotex classic

Jewelry created by famous artists

SNL Big Brawn ad

The alternative limb project

hyungkoo lee

I am the little Dutch girl

I am the little Dutch girl
in the log cabin
I hunt and chop wood
and I repair and build
and I frequently bear the financial burden
of my little cabin.
I still wash clothes
and cook, and clean
and I will birth the children
and feed them from myself
I still like to look and act feminine
but i'm not entirely comfortable with the concept.
Trying to be a woman
but fill both roles
is hard.

The politics of gender words

In my critique today we were talking about the difference between gender issues and feminism. I think that the reason I am loathe to get rid of the word 'feminism' from my project, or from thinking about my project, is the vast history and the brave contributions of the women who have braved the waters of feminism. I also think that there would be no gender politics had feminism not happened, because it opened up the dialogue that everyone should be equal in all fields.
There is a cultural notion of what feminism is, and that is not always positive. I find that if more people who were into 'gender politics' could acknowledge that feminism gave them the freedom to be into gender politics it would be more socially acceptable as a label and as a way of life.

Hey honey, take a walk on the wild side.

Working hard to catch up to myself. My thoughts are running faster than my body can work! Nervous about my thesis review Friday, but i'm sure i'll get a lot of good feedback! 

I am diving into sewing and creating some wearable objects that communicate people's feelings towards  feminism. I am really interested right now in how men feel and think about feminism. I set up a facebook page, https://www.facebook.com/carmensmiththesis , to get some views on some questions about feminism. Please go there and answer the questions i've posted! The answer I think is really cool was answering the question: "I am a feminist and... it doesn't make me any less of a man". 

Getting public feedback on this topic has been interesting. There is an interesting disparity between different ages of women and men. 

This is what i've been looking at this past week or so, lots of internet time. 

Kate Lacour

Anatomical illustrations

Carlos Nicanor

Sculpture

James Reads

Surreal drawings

Female film directors

Willy Verginer

Figurative sculpture

Suzanne Lacy

Feminist performance in brooklyn

Andrea Kowch

Paintings of women in midwestern landscapes. 

Thais Ueda

Paintings and stuff. 

Korean sculpture

Rudt Peters

Male genitals!

Dru Lindsey Patrick

Power portraits

Jessica Todd

Wearable objects

Feminist Art Gallery, "FAG"

Craft In America, Forge

Logan Zillmer

Surrealist photography 

The Mens Rights Movement

This makes me ill, but is interesting from a psychology of crazies point of view. 

Man Boobz

"Misogyny, I mock it"

Getting Over Girl Hate

Guerrilla girl

Thinking about titles, and other things.

http://elizabethbarton.blogspot.com/2013/10/the-importance-of-being-titled.html
An interesting blog about the importance of titles by master quilter Elizabeth Barton!

We were talking about titles in class today with Tamara Tweel, which got me thinking. I love titling my work. It's almost my favorite part of making something. When it's coming together, I have thoughts about it, whether to make it apparent what exactly I am thinking with the piece, or hide my intentions, or just go with the ever classic 'untitled' and let the public translate for themselves. I usually over think titles, and under think presentation. It's something i need to work on!

Reading so much about femininity and feminism, and everything that has gone into culture to bring women to where we are today, I am reminded of my luck. Reading the book The Beauty Myth by Naomi Wolf, written in the 90's but still very relevant, I can't help but think about relationships I have had in the past, where I would try so hard to be thin and made up and beautiful. It wasn't for me that I was doing these things, and I remember obsessing and stressing. I count myself lucky that today I am in a relationship where when I dress up, I do it for myself, and when I lost weight, I do it for myself. I am lucky enough to be in a supportive and loving relationship.

I know this blog is about art but I just thought i'd share what my research has got me thinking about today!

Thesis proposal, revised

Here is my revised thesis proposal, my work has taken a sudden left turn!

Embroidery, before the Renaissance, was a job for both sexes. Men and women working in workshops produced the fine garments and banners that now hang in museums. Around the Renaissance, embroidery became a talent of upper class women and trickled down to the middle classes. Embroidery became a sign of an educated and refined woman, one who has the patience, concentration and fine hand to produce beautiful decorative textiles. For the upper class women, these were given as favours to suitors, as gifts to friends, or to the church. For middle class women, their embroidered objects were used in the house as napkins, hankies, sheets and clothing. Embroidery has a rich feminine history, and continues to the subversive embroidery that is used today in art. I plan to use embroidery to explore what it is to be a woman and a feminist in today’s world.

As a base for this conversation I am using objects that are specifically attached to femininity. These could include feminine hygiene pads, tampons, lipstick, eye shadow, nail polish, dresses or skirts and bras. I acknowledge that in certain situations men use these items but, through a survey of friends, I have come to the conclusion that they are still attached strongly to femininity. I will then embroider these objects with words or patterns to emphasize their connection to the feminine sphere.

I would like to bring forth a conversation about why the words ‘feminist’ and ‘feminism’ are negative words for a majority of the women in my generation, and maybe open up a channel for these women to investigate feminist language and content. I also want to have a conversation with myself about what femininity means to me. It has always been something I was uncomfortable with, and I’d like to confront that and start to understand why. 

The meaning of feminine

This week I am exploring what Feminine means, what decoration means, and what objects are associated with feminism in the eyes of a cross-section of my peers.
I am also exploring why feminist is a negative word in the current generation, and what that means for women in today's world and in the future.
Work in the studio has been productive if a little difficult this week. Pieces have been developing but I have been second guessing myself a lot. Looking forward to my critique to get some feedback on what is working and what isn't. Been trying to get some pieces semi-done or at lease mock-ups for critique, so that I can show everyone what I have been working on.

Here is what I have been looking at this week:
Bart Hess
I know i've posted his work before but it's still amazing

Paolo Uberti
Surrealist artwork. Yummy.

Interesting jewelry and fashion

Overcoming impostor syndrome
An article about 'impostor syndrome', which is when women over compensate at their jobs because they feel inferior to the men around them. It's interesting but I don't know if I agree with all of it.

Alessandro Puccinelli
Beautiful photography

This one is just fun, really intricately carved pumpkins

Lyan de Jesus
Very detailed and deco pieces

Antibiotic city

This week i've been working through the first part of my actual work, while thinking ahead to what's coming next. I dyed 20 yds. of fabric in my kitchen in preparation for the next step! Thinking about what exactly i'm going to do has lead to a lot of questions, and a sneaking suspicion I need to rewrite my thesis proposal. I've been exploring questions of feminism and how feminist theory permeates culture. Also why feminist seems to be such a dirty world in today's generations. I started this project exploring the decorative in everyday objects, and chose the most interesting object, feminine hygiene pads. This led to all of this feminist discussion that is going on in my head. I want to work with the form of the feminine hygiene pad and decoration to express my ideas.

Artists and articles from this week:

Doris Salcedo, Rose Shroud

Broken tampon memorial fund

Toni Demuro

Abused Godesses campaign

Christian Zucconi

This is graphic

Tommy Kha

Nature photos

Morgan Herrin

Mitchell Rose

Bejeweled skulls

Feminism brand problem?

Back with a vengeance.

I am back and ready to kick some arse. After a good strong round of antibiotics I am off the couch and working hard. I have a lot of new and exciting ideas from my first group critique. I am considering very highly doing some quilting, and tackling some difficult subjects dealing with what makes someone a woman, femininity and female politics. We'll see what it ends up as!
I am reading a really good book called The Subversive Stitch and another one dealing with The Everyday. I have others on board to be read once i'm done with these two!

Artists and things i'm looking at this week:
Curtis William Readel

Tim Tadder

Sarah Greaves

Who knew there was special thread for feminine products?

This site is biased toward menstrual cups but has some interesting history regarding feminine hygiene products.

Severija Incirauskaites

Laura Splan

Carina Ubeda
Carina Ubeda and other female artists
This art deals with menstrual blood, so if that grosses you out don't click. Or do.

Nina Katchadourin

Hrafnhildur Arnardottir

begendagain

First week of school is (almost) done!
I was nervous but everything has gone pretty smoothly, including  teaching. Need to work on rivets, i'm so bad at them. Teaching them wasn't hard, but most of the students had better rivets than my examples! That's pretty poor. I practiced quite a few times to make good rivets for the demo, but of course in the demo I couldn't get a good rivet to save my life.
I have started experimenting with a few things for my thesis. Still need to hash some things out, looking for help from my advisor next week. Got about 2 hours of real work done tonight, and socialized quite a bit! It's been fun to meet all of the incoming grads, and to say hello to all the 2nd years once again.

This week i've been looking at:

Egon Schiele

Eyal Gever

I want to buy these

Tang Chiew Ling

Dan Webb

First week, Fall semester

“I am tomorrow, or some future day, what I establish today. I am today what I established yesterday or some previous day.”

—	James Joyce

First week of school has started and is going strong! I learned Monday what it is like as the teacher when making a dumb mistake in front of the class; VERY embarrassing! The class went off without a hitch, and i'm interested in seeing what the ladies in the class come up with for their projects. 

Here are some artists i'm looking at as I go into my first week:

Yore Gorgon

Markus Schinwald at the Venice Biennale

Taylor Holland

Sina

Alejandro Maestre Gasteazi

Sarah Maloney

Arrowmont

Sitting at a computer in the BEAUTIFUL Arrowmont library. This whole campus is just amazing, very comfortable and peaceful. Who would think there is a street full of tourist trap goodness right down the driveway!
Just finished with an Abstract Quilt workshop with Elizabeth Barton. She was a very good teacher, helping all of us to achieve good design and teaching me the basics of quilting. She opened my eyes with a few new tools. I was especially amazed by the darning foot for a sewing machine which allowed me to sew a freehand pattern onto my first ever properly made art quilt. The dye process for the fabric was also incredibly exciting. I immediately went back to my room and ordered dyes so I can do it at home!

Being away from home and immersed in art is an experience everyone should try. I plan to come back here every year, finances willing, or try a different art institution to get my fix. It allowed me to work in a new and exciting way, to change my style and way of thinking about work. I also learned valuable skills that I will hopefully take into my thesis work.

Elizabeth was a big help in pointing me towards some great female artists. Here is a list of some that we used as information or learned about:
Sonia Delaunay
Lee Krasner
Agnes Martin
Julia Loffredo Triebes
Mary Fedden
Elaine De Kooning
Beverly Pepper
Joan Mitchell
Helen Frankenthaler
Yayoi Kusama *
Lee Bontecou *
Bridget Riley
Eva HEsse
Rosie Lee Tompkins (Effie Mae Howard) *
Pat Stein
Elizabeth Murray *
Amy Sillman
Rachel Whitehead
Tracy Emin *
Ghada Amer *
Tomma Abts
Tara Donovan *
Sun Kwak *

The ones with the stars next to them are the women I was particularly inspired by.
Also she suggested Diane Itter